I realized today how deep some childhood teachings go. I bought this loaf of bread that, oddly enough, seems to have been burned along the bottom edge. Every day when I get to the bottom parts of my sandwich from lunch, I think, "Gee, this tastes gross." The blackened edge is dry, hard, and, well, tastes like burning. But I just eat it. Everyday.

Today, while enjoying my peanut butter and banana sandwich and a timeout from my day with the latest short story collection from Stephen King, I got to that charred edge. It was too much. The whole rest of my lunch had been so nice, and yet here was this black nastiness threatening to ruin my lunch. I thought, "I'm just gonna pull that part off." But I hesitated. Why? Because somewhere, deep in my memory, an adult said disapprovingly, "But you need to eat the crust. That's where all the vitamins are. Don't you want to grow up big and strong?"

OK, so who started this ridiculous myth? Who could possibly have decided that nutrients migrate from the soft, chewy center of the bread to the outside? This is unbelievable! Even more unbelievable is that I actually remembered it. I believed it was true! Not only have adults been propogating this terrible lie to children, but we, as children, we swallowing their line hook, line and sinker! What a disaster! What other childhood lies, myths, and general misguided adult "truths" have I and other children believed all our lives?

There's the obvious:

If you're not careful your face will stick that way.
Don't sit so close to the TV, it'll ruin your eyes.
Why? Because I said so.

There have to be others. I know I've heard them, lies parents tell to keep their children in line. And what's worse, I know I'll say those same things to my children. Why not? It clearly worked on me!

The good news? As I'm typing, I can see the charred remains of the crusts of bread in the trash can. Take that, childhood lies!